A very common signal of the cool loser will often involve being a member of the school paper (Sabrina Spellman, Chloe Sullivan, etc). An Informed Loner is basically this, except they supposedly don't even want friends.
This is often seen as a gray area, doesn't carry the obvious negative "nerd" connotations of the Chess Club or the Mathletes, but also isn't seen as "cool" as sports teams or cheerleading.
If he says he really cares about you and misses you but then goes days or weeks without calling or making time to see you because he’s swamped at work, or some excuse along those lines, what he’s really saying is you’re not important enough to make time for.
In fact, I think I have an easier time explaining why men do things than I do with women.
I have been writing about relationships for a while now and over the years I have noticed some prominent points of confusion, ones that seem to be shared by women of all ages from all around the world (no exaggeration).
Some men exploit this by saying things they don’t really feel or believe in order to get what they want, and other men hold back from expressing how they truly feel, knowing that once the words are out there the dynamic of the relationship will irrevocably be altered.
If a guy says he’ll do anything for you and then calls late at night and begs you to come over, claiming to be too tired to make the drive over to your place, then he has a very loose definition of !
We get a lot of questions that go something like: “I’m really confused, my boyfriend says he’s crazy about me and I’m the most amazing/wonderful/smart/funny/etc girl he’s ever dated but he always blows me off and he can’t hang out and doesn’t have time to talk on the phone or text back or take me out on dates and I really only see him late at night when he feels like it.” OK, maybe not exactly like that, but close enough.
Men intuitively know that words are important to women.Unlike people who are Hollywood Homely, Cool Losers are not supposed to be considered unattractive, and unlike the Hollywood Nerd, the Cool Loser is not a geek or lacking in social skills.They just don't have many friends, don't get invited to the cool parties, and are generally treated like losers by most of their peers.Sadly, a lot of relationships collapse before they even get off the ground because the girl can’t handle the sudden decrease in daily texts and instead of dealing with it, she lashes out at the guy and demands explanations for every text he doesn’t reply to.The mistake that many make is thinking that the sudden drop in texts means he’s losing interest or doesn’t care. Most often, he’s just settling back into his normal routine. You can spend all day going back and forth with some guy about nonsense.Countless studies have shown that women primarily gain their sense of worth and self-esteem through their interpersonal relationships while men measure their worth based on their ability to have an impact in the world and contribute in a meaningful way.